I just can't let you go
by Tallow4
Summary: what they didn't show you about what happened between Rachel and Quinn before Rachel's wedding. spoilers for 3x14. faberry.
1. he really makes you happy, doesn't he

"When you were singing that song, you were singing it to Finn and only Finn, right?" Quinn watches her face closely, looking for any reaction, unwillingly hoping for anything but the blind nodding she got in response.

"He really does make you so happy." She didn't understand how, but he really did. And that's what she truly wanted, for Rachel to be happy.

"I want to support you, Rachel, and Finn" she adds his name reluctantly,

"and come to the wedding." She still hated that there was one, but she at least should be there.

"If its not too late." Maybe she had finally gone too far, reached the point where Rachel's endless forgiveness would run out. But she hadn't. Rachel just smiled so wide, that big happy smile that Quinn loved so much, and hugged her. Quinn hugged her back, just savoring the moment. The last time she, or maybe anyone, would get to hug Rachel Berry before she became Rachel Hudson-Berry. Even in thought it still infuriated Quinn.

As Rachel began to release Quinn, to step back so she could go get ready, Quinn only held her tighter, not ready to let go yet. Rachel was content to let the hug linger a little longer, still just happy to be holding Quinn, for them to be happy. Until she felt the sob wrack Quinn's chest, felt Quinn's tears on the side of her neck.

"Quinn?" Rachel pulled back far enough to look at her.

Quinn wanted to run, turn and run and pretend she didn't have this moment of weakness. Instead she let Rachel guide her to the piano bench in the empty choir room. "What's wrong, Quinn?" Rachel tries again, running a comforting hand along Quinn's arm, up to her chin to force tear filled eyes to meet hers, worried and questioning.

Suddenly Quinn found the courage, stopped running and seized the moment. She stood, their bodies as close as they had been a minute ago in the hallway. But a hug wasn't enough for Quinn this time. She kissed Rachel, poured all of her passion, her fear, her emotion into the kiss.

Rachel stood frozen with shock, and feeling so much more than she ever had in a kiss before, and soon she couldn't help but respond, causing Quinn to deepen the kiss, turning them so Rachel was pinned against the piano. The feeling of being trapped there, between Quinn Fabray and the familiar instrument brought Rachel from her reverie, and she pushed Quinn back. "What are we doing, Quinn?" came in a timid voice, confusion plain across her face, as well as a hint of desire.

And the spell was broken, and Quinn realized what she had just done. She stumbled backwards, trying to increase the distance between them and decrease the temptation. But there wasn't enough space in the room. "Wait for me. Don't get married without me there." Quinn still so wished she could be the one marrying Rachel. But she still wouldn't let the girl she loved get married without being there. The words were rushed out of her mouth before she started sprinting from the room without looking back.

"Quinn, wait!" But Quinn was already gone, and Rachel was left with smeared lipstick, mussed hair, and the vision of Quinn Fabray's retreating form.


	2. On My Way

"Wait for me." Three simple words, and they're all Rachel can hear. She sees Finn, and she should be so happy right now, that they are finally getting their happily ever after, but in her mind it's only Quinn. She can't let the last time she sees her before their wedding be her retreating form, running scared from a kiss that never should have happened. She'll know what she feels, what she should do as soon as she sees her. So she'll wait. Waiting can't be too much of a request for Quinn to make. She said she was on her way after all. She's on her way.

* * *

><p>"Get it together Fabray." She tells herself over and over again. I have to be there for the wedding. To support her, her happiness. To object, and support my own. Back and forth, back and forth. She knows she's going to look like a wreck at the wedding. She doesn't have enough time to shower, and the intermittent tears that she still doesn't have fully under control are wreaking havoc on her makeup. But still, she has to be there. She turns to send a quick text, let Rachel know she isn't chickening out, isn't running scared. That she really is coming. "On my way." One second to send the text. One second to reassure her.<p>

What a difference that second makes. The truck was speeding and wasn't looking. Even if she wasn't texting and driving there was nothing she could have done other than see it coming. But still, she didn't even see it. All she saw in her mind was Rachel, walking towards that oaf. And that hurt so much more than the impact.


End file.
